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Headline: JOE BLOGGS MOST ROMANTIC MAN IN IRELAND 2017
Sub-headline: HOMETOWN Man Celebrates in Style
Story:
Black tuxedos, designer names and glamorous models were in abundance yesterday evening as a line of Mercedes cars queued outside the Merrion Hotel in Dublin city centre. A few members of the public waited patiently in the rain to catch a glimpse of the celebrity men as paparazzi camera flashes lit up their faces.
Michael Fassbender was one of the first to arrive, followed quickly by Cillian Murphy, and then eight-time winner Colin Farrell. Entertainment was provided by Daniel O’Donnell, but it was for the award ceremony that everyone had come.
Paddy Power bookmakers had Farrell as a clear favourite to win again this year. Then sometime this summer FIRSTNAME SURNAME came to the attention of the judges. FIRSTNAME, a HOMETOWN native, has really captured the hearts (and eyes!) of both the judges and the public.
Silence fell in the ceremony hall as its host, Georgia Salpa, opened the golden envelope to announce the winner of the Most Romantic Man in Ireland 2017 Award. ‘OMG,’ she commented before she read out the name, ‘I’m not surprised in the least, and he’s certainly one of my favourites – FIRSTNAME SURNAME.’
As humble as ever, FIRSTNAME dedicated the award to ‘all the real romantic men of the world,’ and thanked his mammy for making him the man he is today.
PARTNER’S NAME has not been surprised in the least by all the adulation. She knew she was on to a winner when they first met.
‘I was very impressed with the effort he made on our first date. He was wearing his brand new GAA jersey. And it was ironed. That says a lot,’ she told us in an interview after the ceremony. ‘He talked for hours and hours about his passion for HOBBY/INTEREST. On and on he described it in every detail. I found the subject both refreshing and truly fascinating. I’m not really interested in dancing all night anyway or being twirled around the dancefloor.’‘
He was such a charmer as well,’ she readily admitted. ‘How’s it goin’ was his chat-up line. I’m tired of the French and Italian men being called romantic. All they want to do is buy you flowers and take you shopping or go for long walks on the beach at sunset and listen to me go on about my plans for the future. FIRSTNAME is different. He doesn’t really talk about feelings as such unless it’s something to do with a match on Sunday or his car or something about work. To be honest, I was also getting bored with all the compliments I used to get from other men I’ve dated.'
‘I’m really looking forward to having FIRSTNAME on the Late Late Show next week,’ Ryan Tubridy said. ‘It’s not often that one sees someone that so many women would love to be with and at the same time is just a really cool guy.’
‘One night we were coming back from the pub after watching a match, and his team had won, and he bought me a bag of chips and a spice burger in the chipper,’ PARTNER’S NAME told us. ‘It was lashing rain and he let me share his umbrella and he sang Joxer Goes to Stuttgart by Christy Moore. If that’s not romantic then I don’t know what is!’
We at the Irish Gazette would also like to wish FIRSTNAME SURNAME our congratulations for being the deserved winner of such a prestigious award.
